Thursday, February 4, 2010

Robbie Gasiorowski's Mother Asked Me To Post This

Bless you for having this page in recognition of Robbie.  I'm happy to see his personality shine through in the picture you've chosen - it makes me smile.  I occasionally visit here to connect with Robbie; to seek out something that brings him back for a moment.  Knowing him as I do- I believe Robbie would think your gesture was “sweet!”

Robbie had such a large personality and a special way of being fully present in the moment. He made you feel like there was nothing more important than talking with you and enjoying your company.

His friends could count on him at a moment's notice-at all hours.  He made time spent with him an interesting & fun adventure.  Or a stimulating debate. He loved to joke around and thoroughly explore various philosophies.  Robbie had a quick wit and so much energy- he was always moving! I remember he enjoyed playing chess with his friends over coffee or playing his guitar to the wee hours in the morning.  He often slept in class because of this, too!

Ted and I miss everything about “my little buttercup”.  Haha- yes, I’ve always called him that.  And the thing about Robbie is that he embraced it.  He never shied away from being just himself.  He gladly gave me hugs in front of his friends and expressed his love. Robbie was such a joy!  He loved to slide across the floor in his socks and he kept a ball cap over his alarm clock because the digital light was so bright.  He often hit the snooze 5 or 6 times before dragging himself out of bed!  Whenever he came through the door from work he would announce “hello family!” or “hello momma!".  He enjoyed jumping on the trampoline and sometimes just lying there looking up at the clouds.  Ted would always remind him that whenever Robbie looked up at the clouds he should think of him and remember their times on the trampoline together.  The little memories add up to a life we enjoyed and will always treasure.

Ted and I have been blessed- because of the kind of  friend he was - "The Lost Boys" (Ted's name for Robbie's friends- definitely a story in that) and girls have shown us their immense capacity for compassionate caring since Robbie's passing- their parents would be proud of them (as we are)-our extended family.

Ted and I would like to share something that we hope might be helpful/aid in understanding suicide. Often an assumption is made that suicide is about a "choice to die".  The decision to die is not about "choice" – rather it’s about escaping pain.  Addressing suicide as a "choice" minimizes the extreme suffering of the individual that precedes a suicide.  Contrary to "choice", most people who die from suicide don't want to die; they experience an intense need to escape the pain & despair they feel.  We're certain that it was not anyone’s intent to make light of the complexity of Robbie's suicide and the events leading up to it; so please understand that we have not taken offense.  Hopefully, the sharing of this knowledge will provide an eye-opening basis for understanding, compassion, and sensitivity for all individuals affected by suicide.

It would be great if some of you "lost boys" and girls would take the time to post something about Robbie.  Again, Timothy, I express my gratitude for your thoughtful gesture.

Love,  Margie (Robbie's mom) xxoo